On the way to school one typically miserable morning, he said, “You know, Mom, I’m bigger than you, stronger than you, and faster than you. I’m sitting here wondering why I have to do what you say.” I reached into my purse and pulled out my checkbook. “The reason, son, is that the last time I checked, you were unemployed.” He grinned and replied, “You’ve got a point there, Mom.” He understood that in return for me providing care and support, he had an obligation to comply with house rules.
I thought about that morning recently when reading about disgruntled voters who are threatening to kill our President. Some claim that his election is the end of our democracy. To save us from the “madness”, they have decided to resort to violence. Like my teenaged son, they’ve forgotten about their obligation to comply with the very first contract.
William Blackstone was an eighteenth century legal scholar who is still respected for his knowledge and wisdom. He writes that the “original contract of society” is the foundation of all law. This unwritten contract requires the community to “guard the rights of each individual." In return for this protection, "each individual should submit to the laws of the community.”[1]
From the beginning of time, societies have devised codes of conduct. Our laws are the culmination of thousands of years’ experience in determining the best way to govern ourselves. Our democracy is not perfect but our laws provide ways, such as voting and nonviolent protests, to address those problems. Therein lies our government’s genius and staying power. Therein lies its right to our respect and obedience.
For help with my parenting problems all those years ago, I consulted a neurologist about the change in my children. Either I had suddenly become a bad mother or all three of them were developing personality issues. I had gone from worrying about how I was going to pay for their graduate school tuition to praying that the mischief would never amount to more than a few misdemeanors.
I was relieved but surprised when the doctor told me that it wasn’t my fault. The kids were in fact flipping out. He said that all teenagers’ brains are structurally unable to make reasonable choices. The best I could do was to help them “keep it between the ditches” until their brains finished developing. He assured me that once that happened, I would see the amazing people they were destined to become.
Wearily, I asked how long this development would take. He responded that by the time they reached the age of 23, all should be well. I didn’t know how I would get through the next eight years, but at least there was a light at the end of the troubles.
I’m happy to say that the doctor was right. We experienced challenging times during those eight years and we all learned important lessons from them. But now, I am once again a very proud mom of all three of my children. They have each grown up to be more than I ever hoped for.
It may be eight years before the current political turmoil settles down. Like my teenagers, our government may be experiencing growing pains. But history teaches that our government can survive great challenges. Our nation has endured and learned from a bloody civil war, two World Wars, deadly epidemics, the turbulent sixties, and numerous economic depressions. It can surely handle the upcoming challenges. We just have to “keep it between the ditches” and honor our fundamental contract.
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